We lost my dad last week. So I decided to write about it.

Geoff Cleveland was a fantastic husband, dad, and grandpa. He will be dearly missed. Since I am a writer, I wanted to share some thoughts and memories.

Walk into any room and Geoff Cleveland was probably gonna be the most informed person in there.

Curiosity was my dad’s superpower. He knew a little bit of something about everything. And there’s little doubt he passed that superpower onto me. It’s what inspired me to be a journalist and what continues to push me to ask questions (maybe sometimes too many, but that’s a discussion for another day).

I’m gonna miss learning from my dad. In exchanges, he often brought up something i didn’t know anything about. It was the result of reading multiple newspapers daily for decades. 

I’m really gonna miss being schooled. We lost my dad last week at the age of 71, because cancer is truly a motherfucker.

I’m really gonna miss him. But I’m most heartbroken that my 2-year-old son, Audie, won’t get to grow up with his papa. They shared such a special bond. Whenever we would FaceTime my parents, Audie would inevitably and repeatedly start saying, “Papa? Papa? Papa?” Sure, Audie loved seeing my mom via video, but he really lit up when my dad jumped into the frame.

It’s gonna be extra heartbreaking when Audie finally realizes he won’t be seeing his papa every Saturday morning. (I am really dreading having that conversation with him when he’s old enough to figure out what’s going on. But have I mentioned how amazing my family is and how incredible it is to have them a short drive away from us?)

This post is not gonna be beer-related, more like beer-adjacent. I feel like y’all will allow this one-time divergence. I’m a writer and I guess this is how I’m gonna try to process this loss. It really blows. My dad went from walking his two labs, Gracie and Ruthie, for five miles a day to being too weak to do much of everything in the span of about 90 days. And it was all because of this freak and malicious tumor on top of his small intestine. It took him away from us within three months.

(I really can’t say enough wonderful things about the medical staff at the Wilmot Cancer Center at Strong Memorial Hospital btw. They are truly fantastic and we’re lucky to have them in town.)

Journalism was an unexpected bond

Geoff inspired me in a lot of ways. He made me want to become a journalist. It was because of him that I joined the newspaper club at Irondequoit High School as a freshman. I saw my dad read two or three newspapers every morning and thought it was the coolest thing I’d ever seen. He could have a conversation with anyone and connect with them because he knew a little bit about everything. That curiosity definitely transferred to me, too. (Though I definitely got my love of writing from my mom.)

Journalism helped me find my voice as an awkward and confused teenager. (Though I’ve always been a bit too lippy and impulsive for my own good.) It gave me an identity and reinforced some of my core values — the importance of community, asking questions, not accepting anything at face value, a healthy skepticism (with a touch of cynicism), and pushing to make this community better. Even in my post-journalism life, these values still push and guide me every day. And I knew Geoff was really proud of my work and where it led me.

Beer brought us together, weirdly

My dad wasn’t a big drinker. He loved reading my work and always bragged to his friends about how proud he was of me. But he didn’t drink a lot of beer. He loved hearing about the stories behind the beer and always asked me for the latest news when we hung out. (So again, in that sense, he was the most informed person in the room, because he was asking questions and soaking it all in.)

In true Geoff fashion, he just loved hanging out with me (and then later Audie), so he would often accompany us on our beer explorations. If the drive got to be a little long for his liking, he was apt to complain and grumble a bit about it. Then I would poke him and say we were excited to hang. And he would flash his little smirk with that little twinkle in his gray-blue eyes.

While many people enjoyed the destination, Geoff just wanted to get there so he could enjoy the payoff. Hard to fault him there, especially when I dragged him multiple hours in the car. Again, it was about the support and the chance to hang out once we got there.

And it’s not like he really liked beer all that much. He wasn’t very adventurous and didn’t really like anything outside of crisp, pale lagers. But he liked what he liked. And I could always appreciate that. Geoff was always Geoff.

Who woulda thought that abandoned buildings and graffiti could bring closer together

As mentioned above, my dad put in his miles. He walked those dogs religiously and could often be seen confidently moving around west Irondequoit, regardless of the weather. During the pandemic pause, my wife encouraged me to get out of the house, not only for my mental health but also to preserve our marriage (because we all know I can be a bit annoying and it’s good when everyone gets some space). Somehow (and I’m still not quite sure how), I decided I was gonna explore some of the weirdest and dingiest abandoned buildings in Rochester as I searched for graffiti and public art.

It became my scavenger hunt. If I saw my favorite local writers and artists post pics of a new piece or mural in an undisclosed spot, I would use my sleuthing skills to figure out where it was. My dad became my co-pilot or co-explorer on a lot of those explorations. We were especially fond of trudging up through Washington Grove and meandering up to the abandoned Cobbs Hill water towers to observe and appreciate Rochester’s largest rotating outdoor art gallery. Every time we went up there, we never knew what new and vibrant graffiti and murals we’d discover. My passion became my dad’s passion, because he wanted to just support me and spend time with me. I never got the chance to tell him how much that meant to me. But I think he knew.

And I always made sure to bring a beer or two to enjoy at the towers. He always appreciated that and it was just a great excuse for us to slow down and enjoy some time together. I’m really gonna miss that. It would’ve especially been awesome to bring Audie on some of those excursions when he got older. But I’ll definitely make sure we get up there together in the future.

Some other favorite Geoff facts:

• He was particularly proud of that one baseball game in high school where he struck out 16 hitters

• He liked to brag about being the city track champ in the 100.

• He was married to my mom for 44 incredible years.

• He enjoyed knowingly mispronouncing many words just to irk his family.

• He was often grumpy but quick to smile when you gave him a little shit.

• He spent 34 years working at Eastman Kodak Co.

• He annoyingly could drive a golf ball a mile but he often didn’t know what direction it might head in.

• He was a pretty good bowler.

• He got his one ear pierced in his late 30s, just for the heck of it.

• He was equally proud of my incredible sister, Faith, who has done so much good and is the best auntie ever.

• He was the best grandfather and shared a really strong and remarkable bond with Audie.

Ultimately, I’m not really sure where I’m going with this or what I hope to accomplish. It feels good to be sharing just a little bit about what made my dad so special. He was a great guy. He was often grumpy. He could be a touch surly. But beneath that, he loved deeply. He cared for us deeply. I’m gonna miss those nightly FaceTime calls, the ones where Audie would excitedly ask for Geoff and smirk, kinda like Geoff did.

Thanks for reading. I’m gonna miss you, Geoff.